|
The Bouffant Bullet Dodger, our head administrator, is the swiftest school official in the Southwest. Not only is she able
to magically clear up the construction that has been blocking up the exit from C-wing when camera crews arrive, but she has
also managed to pass off ALL of Las Cruces High School's problems to the students (even if it's just by insinuation) -- including
multiple outbreaks of violence, overcrowding of the school's avaliable hallways, and the late schedule changes for many students,
all of which can be attributed to 1) the lack of administrative control in the school, 2) the head administrator's lack of
planning due to her lengthy vacation over the summer, and 3) her inability to create a schedule that works the first time
around because she is of the overly-high opinion of herself that she is the Alpha and the Omega, the All Knowing GODDESS of
the front office... We all know that this is highly untrue, but the delusional mentality this woman possesses obviously cannot
be changed. So what's her answer: BLAME IT ON THE STUDENTS.
Though I'm absolutely FLATTERED
that she though of us, the students, first when placing the blame, I must admit that my loyalty to her (though already in
a shoddy state) has begun to fade entirely. Though I'm used to taking the blame for plenty of stuff that I have indeed done,
making bad student schedules and causing daily gang fights are definitely on the list of things that I have unfortunately
never had the pleasure to instigate. I am slightly outraged to have it insinuated that my peers and I are the uncontrollable
force at LCHS that causes evil-doings to occur and to eventually, and more than likely, will cause world destruction. What
does she think our mentality is... First gang fights on the tennis courts, then WORLD DOMINATION!!!!! *Evil Cackling*
But I digress. Though my
exaggerations are only that, I can't help but wonder if that's what the Bouffant Beast is presuming to be our collective mentality.
Though she can be assured that the more intelligently satirical members of the student body will support me in this view of
our beloved educational institution, she cannot presume that this article is the opinion of EVERY LCHS student. She can be
assured that there are angrier students, and she can be confident that there is that microscopic minority that supports her
ideas that it's all our fault. Oh well, don't a bunch of little hoodlums like us deserve to take the blame? ;-)
So kiddies, whenever you read
of a problem, a crisis, or complete anarchy at Cruces High, remember that it's your fault. Even if you weren't at school
that day, even if you only went to school at LCHS for one minute of one day, even if your only link to the school is your
mother's best friend's daughter's 2nd cousin three times removed who was a freshman there back in 1950, remember that anything
that goes wrong is partially your fault, so no complaining now, we just have to grin and bear it, but just remember, there's
nothing like a good anarchy to solve the kind of problems that we have at good ol' LCHS.
|
